{"id":17620,"date":"2008-06-08T14:30:00","date_gmt":"2008-06-08T13:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/?p=17581"},"modified":"2008-06-08T14:30:00","modified_gmt":"2008-06-08T13:30:00","slug":"prosel-jsem-hovnem-4","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/2008\/06\/08\/prosel-jsem-hovnem-4\/","title":{"rendered":"Pro\u0161el jsem hovnem&#8230; 4."},"content":{"rendered":"<div>autor: <strong>Cherry<\/strong><br \/>betaread: <strong>Janule<\/strong><\/div>\n<div>Kluci kr\u00e1\u010d\u00ed dlouhou ulic\u00ed po chodn\u00edku, kolem spousta zaparkovan\u00fdch aut. Tom si vzpomene na nehodu s hovnem a tak dojde k jednomu autu. Pod\u00edv\u00e1 se do zrc\u00e1tka, aby vid\u011bl, jestli je upraven\u00fd. Kdy\u017e v\u0161ak spat\u0159\u00ed sv\u016fj odraz, dostane \u0161ok. &#8222;Pane bo\u017ee! V\u017edy\u0165 j\u00e1 m\u00e1m hovno i v dreadech!!!&#8220; za\u010dne \u0159v\u00e1t na celou ulici. Bill se jen cul\u00ed, a t\u011bk\u00e1 o\u010dima z Tomovy tv\u00e1\u0159e na jeho hlavu. A za autem se tak\u00e9 ozve sm\u00edch! Bill se vyd\u011b\u0161en\u011b koukne sm\u011brem za auto\u2026 \u2026a odtamtud vysko\u010d\u00ed dv\u011b holky s fo\u0165\u00e1ky a za\u010dnou si Toma fotit. &#8222;Po\u010dkejte! Co to\u2026 co to d\u011bl\u00e1te? Ihned p\u0159esta\u0148te!&#8220; roz\u010diluje se a sna\u017e\u00ed se rukama zakr\u00fdt svoje smradlav\u00e9 vlasy s hn\u011bdou hrom\u00e1dkou. U\u017e je ale pozd\u011b. Holky se sv\u00fdmi \u00falovky ut\u00edkaj\u00ed se sm\u00edchem pry\u010d.<\/div>\n<div>&#8222;Tak\u017ee i \u010desk\u00fd bulv\u00e1ry si na n\u00e1s smlsnou!&#8220; okomentuje to vztekle Bill a vezme br\u00e1chu za ruku. Jsou spole\u010dn\u011b d\u00e1l a\u017e dojdou dom\u016f.<\/div>\n<hr \/>\n<div>***<\/div>\n<div>Druh\u00fd den jdou kluci spole\u010dn\u011b nakoupit pe\u010divo ke sn\u00eddani. Jdou do pek\u00e1rny, koup\u00ed si pytl\u00edk \u010derstv\u00fdch rohl\u00edk\u016f a vracej\u00ed se zp\u00e1tky dom\u016f. Jdou kolem trafiky. &#8222;Bille, mus\u00edm si koupit nov\u00fd \u010d\u00edslo Playboye!&#8220; zaz\u00e1\u0159\u00ed Tom a sp\u011bch\u00e1 dovnit\u0159. Bill ho n\u00e1sleduje. V\u017edycky si Tomovy \u010dasopisy r\u00e1d prohl\u00ed\u017e\u00ed, hlavn\u011b polonah\u00e9 chlapy.<\/div>\n<div>&#8222;Ty vole!&#8220; vyk\u0159ikne Tom na celou trafiku. To probud\u00ed Billa ze sn\u011bn\u00ed.<\/div>\n<div>&#8222;Co zas je?&#8220; \u0159ekne nevrle Bill a vtom to spat\u0159\u00ed taky. Na tituln\u00edch str\u00e1nk\u00e1ch v\u0161ech \u010dasopis\u016f je Tomova fotka s dready pln\u00fdmi hoven! A pod t\u00edm stoj\u00ed titulky: &#8222;Tom v Praze s hovnem na hlav\u011b!&#8220; nebo &#8222;Tom m\u00e1 \u00fa\u010des pln\u00fd hoven!&#8220;. Tomovi to \u00fapln\u011b sta\u010d\u00ed a tak vylet\u00ed z obch\u016fdku, jako kdyby m\u011bl u prdele raketu. Bill ho n\u00e1sleduje.<\/div>\n<div>&#8222;Tak to snad nerozdejch\u00e1m!&#8220; koul\u00ed Tom o\u010dima a hned si vezme jeden rohl\u00edk a narve si ho do pusy.<\/div>\n<div>&#8222;J\u00e1 nem\u016f\u017eu za to, \u017ee jsi spadnul do hovna!&#8220; h\u00e1j\u00ed se Bill, kdy\u017e v tom vypadne jeho bratrovi rohl\u00edk z ruky. &#8222;Co to d\u011bl\u00e1\u0161?&#8220; zvedne Bill rohl\u00edk a chce se do n\u011bj zakousnout. &#8222;Po\u010dkej! Vid\u00ed\u0161 tam to \u010dern\u00fd chlupat\u00fd?&#8220; zept\u00e1 se vyd\u011b\u0161en\u011b Tom a ukazuje na \u010dernou te\u010dku v pe\u010divu.<\/div>\n<div>&#8222;No jo, ale co to je?&#8220; str\u010d\u00ed si Bill sousto p\u0159ed o\u010di. Tom vyjekne: &#8222;Pavouk!!! Pomoooc!&#8220; A ud\u011bl\u00e1 se mu zle od \u017ealudku. Krkne si a\u2026 hod\u00ed \u0161avli! Za\u010dne zvracet uprost\u0159ed chodn\u00edku. Kolem zrovna b\u011b\u017e\u00ed n\u011bjak\u00fd mal\u00fd pes a tak tentokr\u00e1t Tomovy blitky schyt\u00e1 on a ne Billovy kalhoty. Za psem se vy\u0159\u00edt\u00ed zpoza rohu Nat\u00e1lie a Simona.<\/div>\n<div>&#8222;Sakra, ty debile, co si o sob\u011b jako mysl\u00ed\u0161!? N\u00e1m tady poblije\u0161 psa a\u2026&#8220; \u0159ve Simona a najednou se zaraz\u00ed. V\u0161imne si toti\u017e, \u017ee jsou to kluci z Tokio Hotel.<\/div>\n<div>&#8222;No co \u010dum\u00ed\u0161, ty kr\u00e1vo blb\u00e1! Nevid\u00ed\u0161, \u017ee je mi \u0161patn\u011b?!&#8220; \u0159ekne Tom a hod\u00ed \u0161avli i na Simonu. Ta se nasere a n\u011bkam odb\u011bhne. &#8222;To je ale dneska ml\u00e1de\u017e!&#8220; konstatuje Bill a ukousne pavoukovi z rohl\u00edku varlata. &#8222;M\u0148am, to je ale pochoutka!&#8220; pochutn\u00e1v\u00e1 si Bill. Najednou op\u011bt p\u0159ib\u011bhne Simona s p\u00e1nvi\u010dkou v ruce a majzne Toma p\u0159es palici. Ten se zakym\u00e1c\u00ed a spadne p\u0159\u00edmo do sv\u00fdch zvratek. &#8222;Do prdele u\u017e!&#8220; ulev\u00ed si nahlas Tom a Bill se m\u016f\u017ee pochcat sm\u00edchy\u2026 \u2026teda u\u017e se pochcal &#8211; m\u00e1 na kalhotech mokrou skvrnu. Z toho se zase m\u016f\u017ee pochcat Tom. A taky \u017ee se pochcal, ale nen\u00ed to tak vid\u011bt, proto\u017ee m\u00e1 XXXL kalhoty.<\/p>\n<p>autor: <strong>Cherry<\/strong><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>autor: Cherrybetaread: Janule Kluci kr\u00e1\u010d\u00ed dlouhou ulic\u00ed po chodn\u00edku, kolem spousta zaparkovan\u00fdch aut. Tom si vzpomene na nehodu s hovnem a tak dojde k jednomu autu. Pod\u00edv\u00e1 se do zrc\u00e1tka, aby vid\u011bl, jestli je upraven\u00fd. Kdy\u017e v\u0161ak spat\u0159\u00ed sv\u016fj odraz, dostane \u0161ok.<\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a class=\"myButt \" href=\"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/2008\/06\/08\/prosel-jsem-hovnem-4\/\">Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[134],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-17620","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-prosel-jsem-hovnem"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17620","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=17620"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/17620\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=17620"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=17620"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=17620"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}