{"id":19057,"date":"2008-04-01T01:30:00","date_gmt":"2008-04-01T00:30:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/?p=19016"},"modified":"2008-04-01T01:30:00","modified_gmt":"2008-04-01T00:30:00","slug":"laska-19-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/2008\/04\/01\/laska-19-2\/","title":{"rendered":"L\u00e1ska? 19."},"content":{"rendered":"<div>Tom jako ve snu vystoupil z auta a dezorientovan\u011b se rozhl\u00ed\u017eel kolem. Nev\u011bd\u011bl kde jsou, co tam d\u011blaj, nev\u011bd\u011bl nic&#8230; Jen jedno v\u011bd\u011bl, \u017ee za \u017e\u00e1dnou cenu, nesm\u00ed p\u0159ij\u00edt o Billa. I kdyby to trvalo celou v\u011b\u010dnost, i kdyby to m\u011blo b\u00fdt naprosto beznad\u011bjn\u00e9&#8230; Prost\u011b ho mus\u00ed z\u00edskat zp\u011bt. St\u00e1le si nep\u0159iznal onen fakt, kter\u00fd, si sice uv\u011bdomoval, ale rozhodn\u011b ho necht\u011bl p\u0159ijmout. Fakt, \u017ee Billa miluje&#8230; To se ale m\u011blo ka\u017edou chv\u00edli zm\u011bnit&#8230;<\/div>\n<div>Tom pomalu p\u0159e\u0161lapoval za dve\u0159mi bratrova pokoje a zoufale p\u0159em\u00fd\u0161lel, jak to ud\u011blat, jak Billa p\u0159esv\u011bd\u010dit&#8230;<\/div>\n<div>Vzal za kliku a s hlubok\u00fdm n\u00e1dechem, bez zaklep\u00e1n\u00ed, vpadl dovnit\u0159. Za tento den u\u017e podruh\u00e9, se mu absolutn\u011b zhroutil sv\u011bt&#8230; P\u0159ed o\u010dima se mu m\u00edhaly obr\u00e1zky, kter\u00e9 nikdy necht\u011bl spat\u0159it, obr\u00e1zky, kter\u00e9 se mu vryly hluboko do pam\u011bti, obr\u00e1zky, kter\u00e9 ho p\u0159im\u011bly si kone\u010dn\u011b p\u0159iznat tu, pro n\u011bj, krutou pravdu, pravdu, \u017ee Billa miluje&#8230; Strnule st\u00e1l na m\u00edst\u011b, neschopen jak\u00e9hokoliv pohybu, \u010di slova, neschopen ni\u010deho&#8230; St\u00e1l tam jako p\u0159ikovan\u00fd a vn\u00edmal jen to, co se odehr\u00e1valo p\u0159\u00edmo p\u0159ed n\u00edm. Vn\u00edmal, jak se Billovo t\u011blo v\u00e1\u0161niv\u011b propl\u00e9t\u00e1 s t\u00edm Johannin\u00fdm, jak st\u00e9n\u00e1 slast\u00ed, kterou mu ale neposkytuje on, jak sladce l\u00edb\u00e1 rty, kter\u00e9 ale nejsou jeho, jak chtiv\u011b hlad\u00ed t\u011blo, kter\u00e9 ale nepat\u0159ilo jemu&#8230; Jak se tam miluje s \u010dlov\u011bkem, kter\u00fd rozhodn\u011b nen\u00ed on&#8230;<\/div>\n<div>Slzy mu st\u00e9kaly po tv\u00e1\u0159\u00edch a jemu kone\u010dn\u011b, po neskute\u010dn\u011b dlouh\u00e9 dob\u011b, kdy si to s\u00e1m necht\u011bl p\u0159iznat, v\u0161echno do\u0161lo. Oto\u010dil se a sm\u00ed\u0159en\u011b zam\u00ed\u0159il do sv\u00e9ho pokoje.<\/div>\n<div>Svalil se na postel a plakal. Ano, te\u010f u\u017e to v\u011bd\u011bl, v\u00edc ne\u017e jen v\u011bd\u011bl, byl si t\u00edm naprosto jist\u00fd. Tak jist\u00fd, jako ni\u010d\u00edm jin\u00fdm&#8230; Miluje Billa! V\u017edycky ho miloval a milovat bude. Jen si to nikdy necht\u011bl p\u0159ipustit. V\u017edycky byl proti l\u00e1sce, b\u00e1l se zamilovat&#8230; Necht\u011bl, aby mu n\u011bkdo zlomil srdce. Proto to d\u011blal, podv\u011bdom\u011b to tu\u0161il celou dobu, ale cht\u011bl to v sob\u011b potla\u010dit&#8230; Myslel si, \u017ee kdy\u017e na n\u011bj bude hnusnej, bude se ten cit sna\u017eit ovl\u00e1dat, nep\u0159em\u016f\u017ee jej. Nedostane ho&#8230; Snad se mu to i da\u0159ilo, na za\u010d\u00e1tku to nebral v\u00e1\u017en\u011b, pak se do n\u011bj zamiloval, a pak se u\u017e jen sna\u017eil zamaskovat to, co opravdu c\u00edt\u00ed. Poda\u0159ilo se mu to. Oklamal s\u00e1m sebe&#8230; Posledn\u00ed m\u011bs\u00edce nad t\u00edm v\u016fbec nep\u0159em\u00fd\u0161lel, ale ve skrytu du\u0161e, tam kam se neodv\u00e1\u017eil s\u00e1hnout, ani v t\u011bch nejv\u00edc zvl\u00e1\u0161tn\u00edch okam\u017eic\u00edch, tam to tu\u0161il celou dobu&#8230; Poda\u0159ilo se mu to co cht\u011bl&#8230; Potla\u010dil v sob\u011b svou l\u00e1sku k Billovi. A\u017e te\u010f mu do\u0161lo, jak\u00e1 obrovsk\u00e1 chyba to byla. Nemusel se ni\u010deho b\u00e1t, Bill by ho nikdy nezklamal, to on&#8230; To on byl ten, kdo v\u0161echno zkazil, zni\u010dil, kdo zabil jejich vztah&#8230; Zasm\u00e1l se, vztah? Tak se to p\u0159ece naz\u00fdvat ned\u00e1! Zvl\u00e1\u0161tn\u00ed, \u017ee te\u010f uva\u017eoval stejn\u011b jako Bill&#8230;<\/div>\n<div>On ho jen vyu\u017e\u00edval, byl na n\u011bj hnusnej, nikdy mu up\u0159\u00edmn\u011b ne\u0159ekl, \u017ee ho miluje&#8230; Te\u010f u\u017e v\u011bd\u011bl, pro\u010d mu to v\u017edycky d\u011blalo takov\u00e9 probl\u00e9my&#8230; Proto\u017ee to byla pravda, pravda, kter\u00e9 se tak b\u00e1l&#8230; Pravda, kter\u00e1 ho st\u00e1la l\u00e1sku jeho \u017eivota&#8230; Zoufale se chytnul za hlavu a vzpom\u00ednal&#8230; Na to, jak se Bill v\u017edycky sna\u017eil, na to jak ho v\u017edycky odbyl, jak na n\u011bj byl zl\u00fd a odm\u011b\u0159en\u00fd, jak ho podv\u00e1d\u011bl, jak ho zesm\u011b\u0161\u0148oval, jak se mu vysm\u00edval, jak se s n\u00edm surov\u011b miloval, jak mu dal facku, jak se ho pokusil zn\u00e1silnit&#8230;<\/div>\n<div>Nen\u00e1vid\u011bl se, nen\u00e1vid\u011bl s\u00e1m sebe, za to co ud\u011blal i neud\u011blal. Nen\u00e1vid\u011bl se za v\u0161echno, co kdy ud\u011blal, za to, co ud\u011blal Billovi&#8230; Hnusil se s\u00e1m sob\u011b&#8230; bylo mu bratra tak l\u00edto, postupn\u011b si uv\u011bdomoval, co v\u0161echno zp\u016fsobil, s \u010d\u00edm v\u0161\u00edm Bill musel \u017e\u00edt&#8230; Jak stra\u0161n\u011b moc mu ubl\u00ed\u017eil&#8230; Tak, jako nikdo&#8230; Tak, \u017ee se to ned\u00e1 odpustit&#8230; Teprve te\u010f, po tak stra\u0161n\u011b dlouh\u00e9 dob\u011b, mu v\u0161echno do\u0161lo, jako by se mu rozsv\u00edtilo, jako kdyby te\u010f procitnul ze sp\u00e1nku, jako kdyby ten Tom, co v\u0161echno zkazil, byl n\u011bkdo \u00fapln\u011b jin\u00fd&#8230; Nech\u00e1pal, jak mohl b\u00fdt n\u011b\u010deho takov\u00e9ho schopen&#8230;<\/div>\n<div>V\u011bd\u011bl, \u017ee je konec&#8230; V\u011bd\u011bl, \u017ee prohr\u00e1l&#8230; Tohle se prost\u011b ned\u00e1 omluvit. Pro Billa, sv\u00e9ho milovan\u00e9ho Billa, co\u017e si p\u0159iznal a\u017e moc pozd\u011b, neud\u011blal nikdy nic dobr\u00fdho, v\u017edycky ho zklamal.<\/div>\n<div>A Bill, jeho sladk\u00fd d\u016fv\u011b\u0159iv\u00fd Bill, mu to v\u017edycky odpustil, v\u017edy mu dal je\u0161t\u011b jednu \u0161anci, a on ho jen vyu\u017e\u00edval. St\u00e1le si dovoloval \u010d\u00edm d\u00e1l v\u00edc. D\u011blal hor\u0161\u00ed a hor\u0161\u00ed v\u011bci, a\u017e to jednou Bill logicky nevydr\u017eel&#8230; A on se b\u00e1l, \u017ee u\u017e novou \u0161anci nedostane&#8230; Vlastn\u011b by se v\u016fbec nedivil, jen naprost\u00fd bl\u00e1zen by mu znovu uv\u011b\u0159il&#8230; Chud\u00e1\u010dek Bill&#8230;<\/div>\n<div>Mysl\u00ed mu b\u011b\u017eela jen jedin\u00e1 ot\u00e1zka: Pro\u010d? Pro\u010d si \u010dlov\u011bk uv\u011bdom\u00ed co m\u011bl, a\u017e kdy\u017e to ztrat\u00ed???<\/p>\n<p>autor: <strong>Prinzesschen<\/strong><br \/>betaread: <strong>Janule<\/strong><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Tom jako ve snu vystoupil z auta a dezorientovan\u011b se rozhl\u00ed\u017eel kolem. Nev\u011bd\u011bl kde jsou, co tam d\u011blaj, nev\u011bd\u011bl nic&#8230; Jen jedno v\u011bd\u011bl, \u017ee za \u017e\u00e1dnou cenu, nesm\u00ed p\u0159ij\u00edt o Billa. I kdyby to trvalo celou v\u011b\u010dnost, i kdyby to m\u011blo b\u00fdt<\/p>\n<p class=\"link-more\"><a class=\"myButt \" href=\"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/2008\/04\/01\/laska-19-2\/\">Read More<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_exactmetrics_skip_tracking":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_active":false,"_exactmetrics_sitenote_note":"","_exactmetrics_sitenote_category":0,"footnotes":""},"categories":[92],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-19057","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-laska"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19057","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=19057"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/19057\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=19057"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=19057"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=19057"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}