{"id":19315,"date":"2008-03-24T00:35:00","date_gmt":"2008-03-23T23:35:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/?p=19274"},"modified":"2008-03-24T00:35:00","modified_gmt":"2008-03-23T23:35:00","slug":"vzpominka-8","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/twincestblog.cz\/domains\/twincestblog.cz\/2008\/03\/24\/vzpominka-8\/","title":{"rendered":"Vzpom\u00ednka 8."},"content":{"rendered":"
Nev\u00edm, jak dlouho takhle stoj\u00edme vyklon\u011bni z okna. St\u00e1li bychom tak asi celou v\u011b\u010dnost, kdyby do pokoje nevrazila mamka.<\/div>\n
\u00b4To snad neum\u00ed klepat, nebo co?\u00b4 zavr\u010d\u00edm v duchu.<\/div>\n
„Co to? Co to tady d\u011bl\u00e1te?“ zd\u011bs\u00ed se mamka. Na\u0161tvan\u011b, ale z\u00e1rove\u0148 vypla\u0161en\u011b, se na ni oto\u010d\u00edm. M\u00e1m strach, aby n\u00e1s nerozd\u011blili \u00fapln\u011b.<\/div>\n
„My, no, pov\u00edd\u00e1me si,“ vykokt\u00e1m ze sebe zmaten\u011b. Ani\u017e si to uv\u011bdom\u00edm, rychle pust\u00edm Billovu ruku.<\/div>\n
„Ano? Pov\u00edd\u00e1te? To by m\u011b v\u00e1\u017en\u011b zaj\u00edmalo, o \u010dem,“ pronese mamka ironicky. T\u00f3n, kter\u00fdm to mamka vyslovila, m\u011b p\u0159ekvap\u00ed. Ani si nev\u0161imnu, \u017ee Bill zmizel z okna a te\u010f stoj\u00ed ve dve\u0159\u00edch m\u00e9ho pokoje. „O dne\u0161ku. O tom, co se stalo,“ ozve se nejist\u011b ode dve\u0159\u00ed Bill. Mamka se na n\u011bj oto\u010d\u00ed a j\u00edzliv\u011b pronese: „Jen aby.“<\/div>\n
Tahle v\u011bta zabol\u00ed. N\u00e1s oba. Vid\u00edm zklam\u00e1n\u00ed v Billov\u00fdch o\u010d\u00edch. I j\u00e1 se po t\u00e9to v\u011bt\u011b c\u00edt\u00edm mizern\u011b. Na\u0161i n\u00e1s maj\u00ed evidentn\u011b za tot\u00e1ln\u00ed zvrhl\u00edky, kte\u0159\u00ed ned\u011blaj\u00ed nic jin\u00e9ho, ne\u017e \u017ee se po sob\u011b plaz\u00ed. Jak si to o n\u00e1s m\u016f\u017eou myslet? Ano, v\u00edm, pro\u010d si to mysl\u00ed. Nev\u011bd\u00ed, \u017ee dnes to bylo poprv\u00e9, co jsem se pol\u00edbili. Nev\u011bd\u00ed, \u017ee j\u00e1 ze sv\u00fdch pocit\u016f r\u00e1no byl vypla\u0161en\u011bj\u0161\u00ed ne\u017e oni dva dohromady. Uplynulo sice jen p\u00e1r hodin od na\u0161eho polibku a m\u00e9ho i Billova my\u0161lenkov\u00e9ho chaosu, ale pokud mluv\u00edm za sebe, j\u00e1 u\u017e si sv\u00e9 my\u0161lenky dok\u00e1zal uspo\u0159\u00e1dat. Te\u010f, pr\u00e1v\u011b v tuto chv\u00edli, v\u00edm, \u017ee to, co jsem ud\u011blali, ani jednomu z n\u00e1s nep\u0159ijde trestn\u00e9, nechutn\u00e9, zvrhl\u00e9. Jen jsem si t\u00edm dokazovali, co pro n\u00e1s ten druh\u00fd znamen\u00e1. Jen jako bratr. Nic v\u00edc, nic m\u00ed\u0148.<\/div>\n
„Nic v\u00edc, nic m\u00ed\u0148?“ Kolikr\u00e1t tato slova tento chlapec, mu\u017e, mlad\u00edk, \u0159\u00edkejme mu, jak chceme, pou\u017eil, aby zapla\u0161il ty dot\u011brn\u00e9 my\u0161lenky na sv\u00e9ho bratra? Kolikr\u00e1t si \u0159\u00edkal, \u017ee nen\u00ed mo\u017en\u00e9, aby se do sv\u00e9ho mlad\u0161\u00edho br\u00e1\u0161ky zamiloval. Jen\u017ee on se zamiloval. Ji\u017e p\u0159ed sedmi lety se do n\u011bj zamiloval. Jen si to v prvn\u00edch chv\u00edl\u00edch neuv\u011bdomoval. Nebo sp\u00ed\u0161e necht\u011bl uv\u011bdomovat. Necht\u011bl si p\u0159iznat cit, kter\u00fd ho stejn\u011b dostihl a na kter\u00fd, jak doufal, zapomn\u011bl. Jen\u017ee nezapomn\u011bl. V podv\u011bdom\u00ed ho m\u011bl cel\u00e1 ta l\u00e9ta. Cel\u00e1 ta l\u00e9ta tam byl a s\u00edlil. S\u00edlil, aby ho nakonec zastihl zcela nep\u0159ipraven\u00e9ho na bou\u0159i, kter\u00e1 v n\u011bm te\u010f zu\u0159\u00ed.<\/em><\/div>\n
Ale na\u0161i to nev\u011bd\u00ed a asi ani v\u011bd\u011bt necht\u011bj\u00ed. Nezaj\u00edm\u00e1 je, pro\u010d jsem to ud\u011blali. Zaj\u00edm\u00e1 je jen to, \u017ee se jejich synov\u00e9 l\u00edbali. Necht\u011bj\u00ed zn\u00e1t okolnosti, kter\u00e9 n\u00e1s k tomu vedly. Necht\u011bj\u00ed to pochopit.<\/div>\n
Najednou se ve mn\u011b vzedme vlna vzteku.<\/div>\n
„Co jin\u00e9ho bychom asi tak d\u011blali? To u\u017e si ani nem\u016f\u017eeme pov\u00eddat?“ zept\u00e1m se drze.<\/div>\n
„M\u016f\u017eete. Jen mi laskav\u011b vysv\u011btli, pro\u010d se u toho mus\u00edte dr\u017eet za ruce a b\u00fdt vyklon\u011bni z okna. Pro\u010d si pov\u00edd\u00e1te takhle?“ vyjede po mn\u011b mamka.<\/div>\n
„Proto\u017ee kdy\u017e jsem za Tomem cht\u011bl j\u00edt do pokoje, tak jsi mi to zak\u00e1zala. Jak si asi m\u00e1me pov\u00eddat podle tebe norm\u00e1ln\u011b, kdy\u017e n\u00e1m to nedovol\u00ed\u0161?“ ozve se ode dve\u0159\u00ed Bill.<\/div>\n
Po\u0159\u00e1d se div\u00edm, jak m\u00e1 Bill pro\u0159\u00edzlou pusu. Sice byl odmali\u010dka hrozn\u011b ukecan\u00fd a drz\u00fd, ale nikdy jsem neza\u017eil, aby takhle mluvil s rodi\u010di. Nikdy si nedovolil tolik, co dnes.<\/div>\n
„A ty se mi div\u00ed\u0161? Div\u00ed\u0161 se, \u017ee v\u00e1s nechci nechat o samot\u011b? Po tom, co jste dnes ud\u011blali, se mi div\u00ed\u0161?“ oto\u010d\u00ed se na Billa mamka.<\/div>\n
„Ani jste n\u00e1s to nenechali vysv\u011btlit. Jen jste rozhodli, \u017ee mus\u00edme od sebe a nezaj\u00edmalo v\u00e1s, \u017ee ani my dva nev\u00edme, co to znamenalo,“ za\u010dne se roz\u010dilovat Bill. „Nenechali v\u00e1s to vysv\u011btlit? V\u017edy\u0165 jste se o to ani nepokusili. Ani jste nezkusili vysv\u011btlit, pro\u010d jste to ud\u011blali. Mohli jste to vysv\u011btlit,“ za\u010dne mamka zvedat hlas.<\/div>\n
Te\u010f se do toho vlo\u017e\u00edm i j\u00e1: „Mohli vysv\u011btlit? A vy byste n\u00e1s poslouchali? Nechali byste si vysv\u011btlit n\u011bco, co ani jeden z n\u00e1s nech\u00e1pe? Promi\u0148, mami, ale mysl\u00edm, \u017ee byste n\u00e1s ani nevyslechli.“<\/div>\n
„Co\u017ee? Jak to m\u016f\u017ee\u0161 v\u011bd\u011bt? Mohli jste n\u00e1m zkusit vysv\u011btlit, pro\u010d jste se l\u00edbali,“ k\u0159i\u010d\u00ed u\u017e mamka. Vid\u00edm, \u017ee Bill chce n\u011bco \u0159\u00edci, ale j\u00e1 ho p\u0159edb\u011bhnu: „J\u00e1 nev\u00edm pro\u010d. Prost\u011b se to stalo. Stalo se to poprv\u00e9.“<\/div>\n
„Opravdu poprv\u00e9?“ pochybuje mamka. To Billa evidentn\u011b na\u0161tve, proto\u017ee ne\u017e sta\u010d\u00edm cokoli \u0159\u00edci, on spust\u00ed: „Co chce\u0161 teda sly\u0161et? \u017de se po sob\u011b plaz\u00edme, kdykoli se nikdo ned\u00edv\u00e1? \u017de d\u011bl\u00e1me b\u016fh v\u00ed co, kdykoli jsme sami? To chce\u0161 sly\u0161et?“ Mamka se na Billa p\u0159ekvapen\u011b d\u00edv\u00e1. Je tak \u0161okov\u00e1na, \u017ee nev\u00ed, co by mu odpov\u011bd\u011bla.<\/p>\n

autor: Akkira<\/strong>
betaread: Heluska<\/strong><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Nev\u00edm, jak dlouho takhle stoj\u00edme vyklon\u011bni z okna. St\u00e1li bychom tak asi celou v\u011b\u010dnost, kdyby do pokoje nevrazila mamka. \u00b4To snad neum\u00ed klepat, nebo co?\u00b4 zavr\u010d\u00edm v duchu. „Co to? Co to tady d\u011bl\u00e1te?“ zd\u011bs\u00ed se mamka. Na\u0161tvan\u011b, ale z\u00e1rove\u0148 vypla\u0161en\u011b, se<\/p>\n

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